Archive for record

And Cue The Chewbacca Yell…Now

Posted in News with tags , , , , , , , , , on September 24, 2009 by Enrique Enfuego

article-1215762-068E6196000005DC-457_634x425“Bro, shut the eff up. I’m trying to…nevermind.”

FYI, the baby on the left is normal-sized. I’m not trying to be weightialist, but the newborn on the right is 19.2 pounds. That seems a little steep.

Word on the streets of Indonesia is that this man-baby is for real. I know one Boston Celtic that will be in need of a new nickname.

The baby is now comfortably situated in a North Sumatran hospital feasting on a diet of smaller babies and cheesecake puree.

Enfuego.

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Dead Heat

Posted in News, Sports with tags , , , , , , , , , on April 20, 2009 by Enrique Enfuego
Hawks Heat Basketball

Mario Chalmers, pictured left, struggling so tough. Knowing his love for tender greens, Monday couldn't come fast enough.

Last night, the Miami Heat played their first game of the 2009 postseason against the Atlanta Hawks. In anticipation of their stay in Atlanta, and knowing the potential for extracurricular activities, captains Dwayne Wade and Udonis Haslem, proclaimed that there will be no partying and a curfew would be put in place. 

Instead of getting smashed out on the streets of Atlanta, the Heat basketball team decided to get crushed inside Philips Arena by the hometown Hawks.

This “no-going-out” policy yielded a 90-64 loss for the Heat, a playoff record low for the Miami boys, including a total of 7 points in the fourth quarter.

So tune in for Game 2 on Wednesday night where the Heat plan on employing the opposite tactic and will play the game completely sloshfaced.

Enfuego.

Record Highs

Posted in Events, News with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 20, 2009 by Enrique Enfuego

weather-forecast

Getting high seems to be a theme today and the temperature in Southern California definitely got the memo.

It will be in the 100s in many places around Los Angeles and those lucky fucks who were at Coachella this past weekend had the good fortune of enduring 103 degree heat.

It’s even hotter today. And on a holiday like today, it is really not ideal. I hope we do not read about dead stoners in tomorrow’s paper.

So if you go on a blunt cruise today, roll up your windows and crank the A/C.

And be sure to stay hydrated.

Enfuego.

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