Archive for March, 2009

ShamWow Holds 12X its Weight in Liquid…Does That Include Hooker Blood?

Posted in News with tags , , , , , , , on March 27, 2009 by Jennesis

We all know and love Vince from the ShamWow commercials and we all love his nuts he chops in the Slap Chop, but apparently a hooker didn’t feel the same way. Vince was arrested for beating up a prostitute after she allegedly tried bite his tongue off. According to the police report shit when down as follows:

 

  • Shlomi meets Sasha Harris in a Miami club. They go back to his hotel.
  • She propositions him for “straight sex.” He pays her a thousand bucks in cash.
  • He kisses her.
  • She “bit his tongue and would not let go.”
  • He punches her in her face repeatedly until she lets go.
  • He runs down to the hotel lobby.
  • They both get arrested.

 

Best story I’ve heard in awhile. Thank you Vince, you’ve made my life better via the ShamWow, the Slap Chop, and now your crazy shenanigans. 

Jsis. 

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Rockysoft Mountain Retreat

Posted in Events with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on March 27, 2009 by Enrique Enfuego

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Half of the Rocksoft crew will be away this weekend on a team-building exercise/ski trip/sloshfest in The Centennial State. We hope to report some valuable news, events, cover art, and possibly some Rated R material.

Some of our goals include: paying homage to these guys and these guys, attempting to get a mile high, riding the blue mustang and engaging in a lot of this…

Enfuego.

Pedopheelin’ It

Posted in Rated R with tags , , , , , on March 27, 2009 by Production Team

File this one under ‘sitez for the LOLz thereof,’ right alongside such greats as lolcats, fmylife and fuckin’ wit da homies.

Everyone loves bears right? And bears love everyone! Especially PedoBear.

OK, so maybe not everyone

Those at work beware: lolz within.

-$.

You Just Got Fully Serviced

Posted in Video with tags , , , , , on March 26, 2009 by Enrique Enfuego

One point was all he needed.

Enfuego.

Taylor Swift… You don’t have me fooled!

Posted in Music with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 26, 2009 by Z TRAIN

I have for some reason a copy of Rolling Stone magazine behind my toilet and was mozing thru it the other day. This is the one with 19 year-old flame throwing country singer Taylor (Stromile) Swift on the cover.

People have been telling me she is a fox. But look at this picture people, she is creepy looking, she looks kinda like Sabertooth from X-Men. 

So I’m onto you Taylor Swift. I don’t think you are as hot as I was told you were.

The one on the left she  has mermaid make up on. On the right we have the return of Sabertooth. I also wonder what happens to Taylor if someone pours a glass of water on her face… I’m melting is what happens! The straw that broke the camel’s back for me though was the pic of her as a youngster…

AHHHH!!!!! SCARRRRY!!!

Don’t get me wrong though, I would still poke her… (The one on the right obviously.)

 z.

On another note, this interesting ad was found on the inner cover of the same Rolling Stone issue…

 

THIS MAKES ME FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE.

Rocksoft Survival Guide: The SnugWOW!

Posted in Gadgets, Video with tags , , , , , , , , , on March 26, 2009 by Enrique Enfuego

If you are stranded on a desert island, this is the only product you need.

Maybe one of these too, in case of predators.

Enfuego.

Cupcake Scavenger Hunt 2009

Posted in Events, News with tags , , , , , , , , on March 26, 2009 by Enrique Enfuego

Google Maps has some interesting interactive maps, some more morbid than others. Here they have collaborated with the Los Angeles Times to display this year’s entrants in the 2009 Los Angeles Cupcake Challenge.

If you are in the LA Metro Area jonesing for the frosted pastry, you now know where to look.

Google Maps is the best.

Enfuego.